This contains spoilers for the movie, so be forewarned!

I found the movie to be amazing (of course.) It was beautiful, romantic, but tragic at the same time. I left feeling emotionally wounded in a way…Yes, those men had a beautiful relationship when they were together, but they were both living a lie. I think I felt too much for their families, especially Heath Ledger’s wife and children…his family *clearly* loved him immensely, but his heart wasn’t with them. He basically ruined his wife’s life by having children with her, building a life with her, then leaving her (conveniently) when she said she wouldn’t have any more of his children unless he could support them. What a cruel and heartless thing to do to someone. She was already struggling as it was, working and raising his kids, but then he leaves her on her own (making her feel as if it were her fault.) The worst bit was by that time she already knew something was going on between her husband and his “fishing buddy.” She couldn’t say anything about it either…she had to just deal with it because she couldn’t afford to lose him. But she did anyway…

I just put myself in her shoes. What would I do if I had created this life with a man I adored, had his children, and was planning on growing old with him, only to find out he didn’t love me, but another man?! First of all, the discovery that I was not the love of his life would destroy me completely…but to find out he was in love with a man I’d never met, of whom he’d never spoken…dear god. I don’t think I could recover from such a blow. I would be utterly ruined.

These two men having this relationship hurt so many people around them. Even being a romantic person, I can’t ignore the fact that in the end it was far more destructive than it may have been worth. Things could have been different if they’d chosen to pursue it properly, of course, but their lies and secrets only ended up ruining the lives of people who truly cared about them. That is so tragic and disturbing. They may have *both* been brutally murdered had the truth been discovered. This was not destined to be a happy ending.

I think the film achieved what it meant to: to show a realistic interpretation of a love story between two men who chose to keep their relationship a secret. Perhaps its realism is what got to me so much, which I’m sure was the point.